On blowjobs: "If you decide to go there, you finish the job. No complaining." I don't care if it sounds like she's talking about Iraq, I'm in love.
So i got in my car, the seats are leaned back, and soft soul music is playing. Wtf happened last night.
She threw up all over when she was giving me dome. Not even gonna lie, it felt really good.
On the way home from Florida I threw up at the beginning border and ending border of 6 states. You win this year Spring Break.
he turned the pretty ricky playlist on. its about to go down.
Come outside. The vendor wants to go out strong tonight! Russian hooker interviews. Don't ask. We leave in 3 minutes.
Legitimate concern. Who am I going to have birthday sex with?
This hobo said he can't buy alcohol bc he got in trouble bc a girl sat on his face when he was passed out and misaligned his spine and gave him Alzheimer's so Ali is buying him a bottle. This is Vegas.
He tried to convince me that it wasn't really that small and all he had to do was pull back the groin fat. It was still small.
Denim handjobs are the worst handjobs. I hate all handjobs. Why do people even.
I walked out ot my car in the morning thinking there was a sandwich I left there from yesterday. Then later that day I was checking the mail and saw the other side of my car :/
It concerns me the most that u were potentially going to eat a day old car sandwich.
The worst thing about having to live at your parents again is the struggle to make up more excuses to cover up the booty calls.
I love you even if you are fucked up. If you fall, i'll just get on top of you.
What doesn't this kid understand that our relationship is not going past the blacked out blowjob I gave him on his birthday?
Someone made a Christmas song to the Flintstones theme and I'm suing for emotional distress.
Randomize
