In similar news, my cock is bigger than the plane that landed in the hudson.
your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
I'll be waiting for you under the stairs with peanut butter and tequila ... Don't tell the neighbors
Santa Clause just drove by me on a fire truck. Epic night begins.
I called her new haircut "lesbian progressive" and now she's upset
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
Look bro I'll go half per boob with you, we split her.
i am willing to donate my body to this science experiment when it means free blowjobs
I was sleeping pretty good until your cat pooped loudly. I dreamed that a full grown man was pooping on my ear. It startled me.
My one regret (beside the inevitable shit storm that followed) is that now I can't fuck his cute friend.
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
Costco cheesecake and whisky. A night made in heaven
I'm only texting you this bc god forbid circumstances change when you wake up but currently santa is asleep on top of the washer and dryer.
The covid immunization shot lady also sold me a mondo bag of really good pot.
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