See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
i know it happened because it happened right beside me, and at one point on top of me.
I just spent a pre-4th of july celebration riding in a raft being towed by a car through a town that I've never heard of handing out flyers for a river rafting company that I never knew existed. Good night.
Some kid just popped open a giant PBR and walked into his final...
It was awk he was sittin on a plastic backyard chair in his underwear and high white socks in the dark watching the nuggets game
True love: he brought me a margarita while was in the shower. He's a keeper.
Yes, yes I will fake crap in his house for you.
Nothing worse then being at the gym on the elliptical next to a guy looking at porn on his phone
look on the scale of 1 to the time you hit an old lady with your car chlamydia barely even rates
Baruch atah adonai DAT ASS DOE
Even with help how did you paint a bullseye around your asshole?
is that a dick in a sweater?
That's why i need nudes. Plutonic nudes.
I think I came out of my blackout as I was ordering wine from the private wedding reception.
I know! It's like he knows when my vagina wants to misbehave!
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