**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
Maybe i should go to church more so i can meet girls like in that song, you know, the ones that act slutty on every day but sunday...
ah, so the catholic church. i gotcha
You deserve yourself a blunt and a build a bear.
I just saw a fat chick walking across campus talking to herself and licking her lips. Diet season is scary.
I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
FUUUUUCK she froze all my quaters inside the ice cubes again
I just finished deleting miscellaneous contacts from my phone ... time for a HIV test!
I think he is probably a psycho that will eventually murder me but i mean the sex last time was AWESOME.
Idk who invented dominoes cheese steak pizza but I wanna lick their balls
I can't believe you picked a finger in the ass over lunch with me.
Why am I sticky / covered in baby Tylonel?
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
dont go in the freezer to fetch your weed. my vibrator may or may not be in there. not sayin, just sayin
THERE ARE LEGITLY 4 SEPARATE BITE MARKS ON MY DICK. WHAT. THE. FUCK.
Legitimately*
Go fuck yourself
you have 30 seconds to convince me not to grab this guy's crotch in front of his girlfriend
Randomize
