um i just went through the in-n-out drive thru and meant to ask for my cheeseburger animal style. turns out what i actually said was, can i get that cheeseburger doggy style? been a rough weekend.
I just woke up. In the port-o-potty next to our tailgate. an hour after the game started. explain.
I just used my 7th grade year book to figure out who I hooked up with last night. Being home is magical.
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he opened the microwave and beer cans poured out
I think the world is coming to an end. Earthquakes, huricanes, floods, and now you say you LOVE him. Im building a shelter and going into hiding.
Dude you took some guys glasses off his face and ran out of the bar
Driving a mountain pass in the middle of a blizzard with the worst vodka gummybear hangover ever is gods way of telling me to keep the black-outing within a 15 mile radius to my house.
Just googled "penis wearing a hat" i think it's safe to say nobody found my ex's lost phone...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Does this mean I don't have to apologize for launching about 20 bead necklaces at you from the balcony?
He brought me four big burritos and two joints! He can sleep with his bank teller any time he wants!
When we tried to make a video I set the camera to 3sec pictures accidentally so instead of a movie we have a flipbook of our sex.
I used my iced coffee to ice the bump on my head from last night
Looks like he unfriended you too. I feel like we were both just handed negative pregnancy tests.
I'd have to have a ring. Like I don't want to be called "the ex girlfriend that shit on me"
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