Godddamnit i jsu woke up in oharee. My connecxtion left an hro ago. Thosse flight atttendants can DRinK
You should probably wake up already as I have yet another story for you. Teaser? Blood from knife wound. Tequila. Guitar hero. Kitchen counter. Lawyer.
And there are taco shells on the ceiling fan
Just wanna let u know that we are almost on the pity blow job level of our friendship.
I made out with a guy because he was sitting on my coat...
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
that's just what you get for learning massage techniques from gay porn
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
You should make a checklist to ensure they are quality material. Here's mine: wearing shoes, not drunk, very hot, has teeth, speaks english. You never know
I was trying to pee in the bushes and the person who lived in the house where the bushes were planted started knocking on the window to get me to stop peeing in their bushes
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
Having sex with him is like eating mayo. Don't think about it, just do it. It's worth it.
When you wake up to a porn star on your couch telling you, you better tell your boyfriend about last night.
I asked for a cup of water. They gave me tequila. They WANT ME TO DIE
There's a possibility I may have hooked up with that British guy...
Possibility? You left the door open! Everyone saw!
Randomize
