you know i think I know why you are single...because you are real cute but then you open your mouth and let words come out and all goes to hell.
he looks like a really good dad on facebook
we'll go far in life on tits alone.
Talking about the game in the closet with a banana wearing sunglasses.
well this is gonna sound really bad but we were fooling around on sandra's electrical wheelchair
I woke up on his couch and my bra was flung across the floor and filled with animal crackers
You know just a typical night. Eating peanut butter off of tablespoons and having sex to our favorite Christmas carols. This is my favorite time of year.
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
Why is there a traffic cone in the shower? And did you wash it with my body wash? It smells nice.
Dude, he wouldn't have sex with me during halftime cause we were rooting for different teams and that would be "bad juju", I had to settle for 69.
YOU HAVE BEEN BAD TOUCHED BY THE LEPRECHAUN OF CHOICES
I was gonna respond but i couldnt figure out a way to rearrange 'fuck his brains out' to sound grammatically correct
It was great. Except he kept asking me to lick his butthole, I was like firm no
Ignore him I am the one that wears the pants in the relationship while "the big man" cries in bed
Drunk twilight is the only twilight
Randomize
