i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
god damn woman. you are like the herpes of drunk texting. you never go away.
Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
I think the puke all over the side of my car actually improves its appearance.
I may be in pain from falling off the roof but getting to the morning roof keg was well worth it.
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
well you decided to make everyone "drinks" which was sprite and beer mixed.
If a video of someone that looks like me banging that chick on the hood of her car in some parking lot suddenly shows up on the web... let me know, I gotta see how that turned out.
literally hosing herself off in my back yard with the hose. i offered her the shower but she refused. that drunk.
I found what appears to be half an E pill and part of a tooth in my pocket this morning
Just asking. Could've given you a lap dance in a sombrero, drenched in corona and tequila.
God Bless cinco de mayo
I'm getting the lip of my vagina pierced & you expect ME to be the voice of reason?
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
I just used a box o wine to refill a bottle o wine to more effectively drunk clean
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