Pish posh, there's never a bad time to eat food off my body.
I bet farrah fawcett is having words with michael jackson in heaven for stealing her thunder
I wish there were college classes that were useful to your daily life, like how to pack a proper bowl in pitch black darkness.
I can't believe you just thanked me for a blowjob on my Facebook wall...
Nah nah nah the rules are different on st patty day, drink beer or die. It's like the hunger games but blurrier
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
she gave me her number and i just said "no. cant."
I sliced my fucking arm open last night after margarita madness and had to drive myself to the ER. Got six stitches and a social worker came in and asked if I was abused due to my sex bruises. I literally had to tell her "don't worry, I like it rough"
We can get high as fuck when there are no orders. If not its cool. I just figured Take Your Blunt Buddy To Work Day.
Some dude with an OSU jersey just kissed him in the face in front of everyone. I should mention he's wearing a Panda costume. And has already been offered $20 for his suit by Plushies for oral sex.
You were so drunk that you didn't even notice when I switched out your shot of jäger for a shot of maple syrup...before or after you drank it.
I told her to to let go of her rationtal thoughts and just enjoy the fact that i was going down on her till she passed out from sheer orgasmic pleasure.
I'd have to have a ring. Like I don't want to be called "the ex girlfriend that shit on me"
You took your pants and underwear off as soon as we got to Melissa's and just walked around the entire time like it was completely normal. We even ate pizza together with your vagina exposed. You're my hero.
just spent the last 20 minutes cleaning out the soap dispenser. fuck. me. adderall.
Randomize
