so im watching realhousewives of jersey with my mom. she just said they werent really rich bc they were doing their own makeup.
Why are handjobs necessary in class?
He had a stripper pole in his bedroom. I didn't know whether to be impressed or creeped out.
the meat mosque collapsed into the alcohol moat
Update: we are pushing the start of day drinking back from 9 am to 10 am. Minor delay.
I specifically found a fat girl to lift me up on her shoulders.\n\nIt was glorious.
my hip hurts so fuckin bad. and I just found a half eaten burrito in my nightstand drawer.
Drunk at ten am watching Californication re runs. Being divorced rules.
Dude.. full face helmets and hangovers do not mix... I am never going to get rid of the smell of puke.
You started drinking at 2:30, did you really think you would be able to remember?
Bro, I just googled 36 year old pussy so when I do see it I won't be shocked.
My booty call is in the theater watching Deadpool right now. Never though comics would work against me.
Kinda suprised you didn't immediately ask about the lesbian ghosts tho
I don't even know if he's actually hot or just hot because he plays hockey..
You did not just say that.
I'm tired of you and your emotional constipation. WHY DO YOU CLOSE YOUR EYES WHEN WE MAKE LOVE!?
Randomize
