you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
Just ran interference for her again. Sometimes i wonder how many times in my life i'll have to be a cock block at the clinic
he's drinking beer at home in his underwear tonight and if you want to come over the dresscode is underwear only. And you have to bring beer.
Sorry I dragged you across a parking lot
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
High enough to ask the woman at best buy if she ever feels like she's swimming. and telling the man outside that he smells like happy juice.
I just found a piece of glass in my ear from Saturday.
I'm doing shots of jagger in dixi cups and making a lesson plan for my 8th grader summer school class. My life is so close to adulthood I can taste it
I think he was trying to tie my clitoris in a knot with his tongue. So awful.
Hurry there's four guys dressed up as a bachelorette party, one has a condom veil and the rest are selling candy bouquets and asking if anyone wants to get laid for $5
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have a pair of clean panties in my purse. This is having your life together.
Will you be super villain lesbian lovers with me for halloween?
"What's your dick like homie" is not really an acceptable thing to say out loud
If catching your vomit in my hands while swimming in a bath tub full of it doesn't make us best friends, I don't know what will
We're both fucking guys named Frank. Our friendship was meant to be.
All I heard was "sit on my face" "okay" and muffled screaming. I'm still disappointed.
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