apparently vodka and oj turns green when you throw it up
basic color theory
I hate that the only Italian aspect of me is I get red and sweaty when I drink
She's thinkin about havin beer pong at her reception... She's walkin a fine line between trashy and the best idea ever
Just saw a motorized bathtub. I think this college thing is gonna work out.
Ive consumed more rum studying for law school finals than I did that time I fucked that fat chick in the back of VW Beetle. It's all ugly, but for different reasons.
If her puking on your pool table is her sign of a good night, it's time to intervene.
Just had a heart to heart with my John Belushi poster.
Would be in best interest to sanitize the DVDs
All I remember is sitting on your kitchen floor and playing with a banana like it was a viking ship.
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
Just walked in and got handed a drink. Good service
His front door was open but I INSISTED on army crawling FOOT FIRST under the garage door. Then I peed the bed.
I forgot what I was gonna say, but I'm pretty excited to not be pregnant.
Just got home, my brothers stoned and he got a high score on COD.. He just asked me if I wanted to have a celebrational yogurt with him. Wtf?
I'm fine. Heading home now...crying. Michael Bolton totally understands me!
Randomize