Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
Exactly how low is masturbating to your cute professor's lecture videos?
All I know is for some reason I was sitting naked in the hallway playing an invisible ukulele singing somewhere over the rainbow. I wonder why security came.
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
I wish we could skip the pretense of being normal and just start drinking wine with breakfast
I wouldn't have puked last night if I didn't inhale straight pepper from you shattering the pepper shaker on the wall.
I fell asleep while we were Skyping and woke up to his balls bouncing in front of the camera while he sang "Wakey Wakey!" over and over again. Merryfuckingchristmas.
He called me on my way to the bathroom and told me he wanted to hear me pee my beers out... That. Drunk.
She's just done the monthly not prego dance around our kitchen
Had sex with one of the guys from Ireland. Celebrating st pattys early.
I'm home alone drinking wine, so high, scrubbing my house down... This is what my thirsty thursday has become
My whole sorority girl exterior is just a lie. I'm a fat tumblr girl on the inside.
Drive by water balloon fight on $500,000 boats ended when someone threw a dildo
i don't know man... i just want to listen to John Lennon every time i finish fucking her. is this love?
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