you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
It was so romantic--he turned me around to face the sunset during doggy-style over the couch back.
This place doesnt have redbull or serve shots. Its like they are at war with fun.
He only talks to me during the summer and it's probably because I let him fuck me in my pool last year.
Come over. Drunk tacos.
That isn't even a sentence.
I kept the important parts.
I tried giving you a bj last night and all you could manage was "Haha that tickles" and "in the morning"
My bullwhip has saved my life tonight and gotten me laid. I'm gonna be Indiana Jones every Halloween!
i love him because he let me keep my UGGS on while we had sex
There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn
My fall semester strategy is to submit my papers with a nude selfie
You've got post-grad studies written all over you
I feel like a drive thru vagina
We broke up. My life is now 7 inches less.
You made me promise I wouldnt let you play "fuck fuck goose" with a 40 year old ever again.
Have you actually looked at the corn flakes box? I don't think the rooster has a soul.
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