they had a keg party to fund her abortion.
Who was that guy you went home with?
Hang on, I'm trying to ask his name right now.
The UPD just told me that he was going to call the cops if i try to run. you owe me 5 dollars, i told u they arn't real cops
they would be such cute babies and they would grow up to have huge dicks. and that would make me proud as a mother
i'm sorry i gave your brother a handjob while you were on the blanket next to us, but to be fair your back was turned.
I have a rage boner right now. An actual erection brought on by the amount of sheer hatred I have towards nationwide.
Just realized I probably only have one more wedding where I can say I fucked the bride.
About to go get a free burrito for kissing a bald man in public
Are you stuck outside of your house because you forgot to walk up stairs? Cuz I've been there.
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
Somehow she is more off limits now than when she was his girlfriend
Me and Jason had to grab your legs and arms and drag you in the house. You kept screaming "leave me for dead"
COKE WAS NOT ON THE ITINERARY FOR TONIGHT.
Fuck man, I am really high rn and all I've eaten is different forms of pie
Why is this not the first time I’ve seen the mugshot of someone I’ve slept with
Randomize
