Taylor Swift is so right about you.
And then a tiny penis fell out of my purse
She started acting like she was actually a deaf person...so I went along with it and acted like her interpreter. I don't think anyone bought it.
You spent most of the night crying and throwing leftover meatballs at the neighbors dogs
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.
Talking to a male stripper. About the LSAT. Only in Vegas.
First thought today, I need a ventriloquist dummy that looks like me. This week's project has been determined.
If eating a cheesesteak naked doesn't make me feel better, then I don't know what will.
Let's be honest. I make up for my well below average sized penis with a great personality and a possibly successful future
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do u like your dick pics shot in hotdog or hamburger orientation?
Try explaining "the nature of your relationship" to a cop when your fuck buddy vandalized your car. Priceless.
I told him I'd ride his broomstick if he let me call him Harry Potter and drew a lightning bolt on his forehead.
He stopped mid sex to pour wine in my mouth...
Marry him.
Bro you were on fire last night...like a less Irish version of Liam Neeson
Quit being awkward towards me every time the group is together. They're going to figure out we're fucking.
Randomize