she reminds me of the kind of girl who'd fuck in church if you asked. I can dig it.
On my way home I stopped at target and bought beer and galoshes. I am a planner.
i was gonna fuck her but then she started eatin sushi from her purse. i really need to raise my standards
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
oh, you know. just sitting in my bed high as fuck wearing a windbreaker and watching british tv.
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
I wish I could just hang out in ERs.
Okay. How did someone manage to piss on TOP of a urinal? What giant is roaming around with a prick five feet from the ground?
Just pulled a Kenny Powers on a snowmobile
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude fuck drugs. It's 4am and I'm eating mushroom ravioli fantasizing about jumping on a trampoline
No, the high point was when you stood on a chair and shouted you were the god of tits and wine.
He was stoned laying on my bed singing I'm a little tea cup while I took a pregnancy test. Thank god it was negative.
You ask to touch his thighs ten times and called them magnificent.....need I say more
All i remember from last night was that i was sitting on the toilet for a good hour eating a philly cheesesteak hotpocket... then i woke up... in my bed.
She’s super into those renaissance faires. But, if you can’t actually stab anyone, what’s the point?
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