The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
So, I'm about to rent a movie, order pizza, and use my vibrator.... Am I dating myself?
I haven't been able to trust a girl since spanks came out
Well if I am having twins, at least I'll finally have 2 kids by the same father.
I lost my grandmas ring. Probably during the handjob.
DO NOT GO IN OUR BATHROOM. it cannot be unseen
and ive been naked for the greater part of the evening. alone, drunk, and naked. i think that is how all great interventions start.
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
Omg, you would have loved the guy I almost hit with my car tonight
I met her at the quidditch match. She was the snitch and I caught her. After at the bar she walked up grabbed my hand and said snitches have flesh memories.
I do feel like I owe you an apology for trying to fuck your dad last night but in my defense everyone knows I shouldn't drink tequila.
I pulled you and a keg around in a wagon for like five hours and apparently everyone else remembers it but us.
He's a cop. Do you know how many times I've said fuck the police? This is my chance. I'm taking it.
Blacking out in the security line at the airport is not nearly as fun as blacking out in the lunch line at the dining hall.
Did you ask Harvard boi?
Apparently he likes someone who is into being smart and a supporter of human rights ugh what a skank
Randomize
