I molested 6 butterflies tonight
the only time it's appropriate to sing In The Air Tonight by Phils Collins is while sake bombing at Cal Beach
um or while having sex on a train
there's a taquito in the driveway. If it's not yours I'm going to eat it.
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
Wine floats aren't as good of an idea as they seem
After the baby comes, I'll make us White Russians with my breast milk. That will teach her about sharing.
I'm convinced my penis is the only thing holding this relationship together.
the upside of dating someone over 21: he can buy me a pregnancy test AND a bottle of wine when he goes to cvs for me
I'm pretty sure I did the Macarena with a gay guy while shot gunning a beer
You're tall, so I have high hopes for your dick.
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
His chest is so hairy i want to pet it with my nipples.
Wow. Memory lane. What a horrendously unsightly jizz stain on the tapestry of life.
Hey, how are you?
No. You're dead to me, you hamster stealing slutbag.
She climbed in my window blew me and left. She's in my phone as the blow job fairy
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