Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
I closed that bar. Sang every Beatles song in the book. Made Somoan friends.
i just identified you from a description of your pipe
Going to the hospital for stitches on my balls. Mom walked in on me manscaping with an electric razor. Tell NOBODY.
29 Frat Parties That Got Way Too Out Of Control
I asked him if his doormat had a name, then proceeded to sit on it for the next 30 minutes while signing that magic carpet ride song from aladdin.
I found you laying in the kitchen with a bottle of vodka and a slice of bologna on your face. You said you were having a spa day.
He ate me out like a beaver on a tree. I've never been so scared in my life
I just sit in the cubicle for 8 hours and do keagles.
fat people need to stop using the handicapped bathroom stall so I can have sex in it. it's common logic
15 Ridiculous Ways Broke People Managed to Make a Buck
So update from last night: I made friends with a coke dealer, I tore the card scanner off the wall of my dorm, and I passed out on our bathroom counter with my head in the sink.
Which one of you fuckers thought itd be funny to see if the kitchen table can float.
Better safe and shitfaced than hungover and in need of another surgery.
We spent 45 minutes searching the crevices of our friend's car with a pair of tweezers trying to find the acid that we dropped
I feel awful. The bartender added me on Facebook and there's chips all over the bathroom floor
Went home with a guy last night with Taco Bell sauce in my hair and on my pants