Me hooking up with her is like rush being president. Bad news.
I just spent the last 30 minutes shaving my asshole.
You told her the u were going to wrap your dick around her neck and start her like a lawn mower. thats why she left.
I have the money I owe you for auctioning off your black thongs. Best 30 bucks ever spent
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Use motel 8. I'll give you my credit card #. i'll pay for it cuz i care about your vagina.
Dude your not gonna get by security covered in blood wearing only a robe
Don't worry I'm drunk they won't say anything
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
What I do when I'm blackout drunk is none of my business.
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we got her to the bathroom intime. all she could say was 'now my bladder is empty just like my soul'
We're both clumsy. What does this imply for our kids?
I'm sitting in the breakroom facing a very large sign that says "inappropriate workplace behaviors", and i can't help but feel like it is directed at me
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
he came during what was supposed to be the foreplay blowjob. there goes my evening.
Alas, I cannot find a male suitor sharing my affinity for sport culture who will both manhandle me and treat me with the respect a young Hillary supporter wants and deserves