Is it too much to ask that he stop calling me 'titty fuck' in public?
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
you're by far the better bro. your dick is more impressively sized, anyway
I hate that you know that from experience
Fixing to yell "you're too hot for her" at a Gerard butler look alike. There is absolutely no way this is going to end well...
Nice. Don't spend your therapist's co-pay on Jaeger bombs.
Called the cops on a high school party then went in after all the kids ran away and took the rest of the beer. What are you doing tonight?
By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
I'm not drinking cause I'm like 4 vodkas away from a boom box and Peter Gabriel.
My text message history should be ashamed of itself right now.
Opened my purse to realize I have someone else's birth certificate. What happens to me in college?
I have random bruises including my spine and visible bite marks on my neck. Thanksgiving car sex accomplished.
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
I have never encountered a chode in the wild
Currently tripping balls and watching Pink Floyd the wall and I'm crying during it. If this isn't a self realization then I don't know what to tell you.
I like to listen to classical music when I eat taco bell. I think it cancels out the aura of poverty and desperation.
Randomize
