even in the morning, she still thinks my british accent is real.
We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
My TA just asked me why I was late to class. How do I say because I was having the best orgasm of my life in Arabic?
I had a guy present me his prison release form this morning as id
buying new sheets for when my mom visits. I can't in good conscious let her use the ones from last night
My chest hair is, as we speak, arching upward to embrace my neck beard. The union will be a storied one.
Are the homeless actually allowed to bathe in fountains located on Main Street in downtown Houston? Can Houston TX be so progressive as to condone public bathing?
I threw up for like 20 hours. Im gonna be the DD for the next 5 years.
You know you have done too many drugs when you gum the sugar off your margarita without even thinking twice
I just woke up naked next to a GetGo sandwich and I can hear my cats are eating my combos. So that's my life.
We have GOT to stop getting stoned and going out for expensive dinners.
Just used the pen i got in my signing ceremony to pack down my bowl. coach would be proud
I blame her lesbian super powers of coercion.
Randomize
