I'm in a room alone pouting because I got the wrong nachos at taco bell.
Nobody needs to come anywhere. Except on your face.
Four minutes until I can fart!
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
she made me put on a condom before giving me a handjob...this is why i hate freshmen
I like your house better though. Cause it has febreeze and lube.
I don't think you have any idea how kinky that sounds.
Chalk up having sex in a car wash.
I'm a lady, I can't pee on the ceiling. Even I don't have that power.
You kept showing everyone at the bar your bra to prove it matched your shoes.
I can't stream porn because Xbox live is taking all the Internet. I thought having a male roommate would make life easier.
He has a lot of emotional energy invested in your vagina.
You just kept walking around in a circle saying "well played 6th street well played" before falling over.
i puked in the 2nd best shower and the couple fucking in the 1st didnt even pause so you might wanna hold off on that for a while
I've grown it out to 70s proportions. I'm calling it my chastity pelt.
She looked like a cross between Jesus and John Lennon. So I fucked her. I feel majestic and powerful.
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