You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
i'm in the sorta mood where i wanna be that crying, drunk girl who will hook up with anyone that tells her she's pretty
Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
Just found out you can rent the rollerena for 100 bucks and you can bring your own beer... when are you free this week?
As it turns out, strippers don't accept checks.
She told me to stuff her like a turkey. She actually yelled happy thanksgiving.
I mean, I know going to rehab probably didn't make her a lesbian, but I can always hope
Thanks for alerting everyone in our apartment what your one night stand's name is. Could you scream a little louder?
he may be homeless but his dick however is not... anymore.
She said our goal is to fuck in every bathroom at the reception which is at a country club. I will have the best wedding date ever! Were 4 for 4 in public.
it's all fun and games til I text you in last nights clothes with a head bleed
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
He saved you from those guys at the club, took you home, and made you breakfast. If this isn't your come to Jesus moment IDK what is.
How's moving going?
Uh, we're on the way to the store to buy more booze
skipped tacos for a blowjob. No tacos. No blowjob. More importantly...no tacos. Wtf?
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