friends don't let friends hook up with gingers.
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
She climbed through the window and into my bed. Not even sure who she is. Was thinking she might be a friend of yours?
you know you're a senior when your friends are at the bar before you even get out of class
why the fuck would you go to class? it's karaoke wednesday.
Claiming territory at this party means signing a girls ass...I've got dibs on a blonde
Come to wine Wednesday bro. We have a fog machine
Everyone is now just referring to it as "the night Hannah couldn't get laid" so needless to say you didn't miss much
is it too much for me to say that i have a ziplock bag with ice in it in my underwear?
Honestly and this might sound scary... But I want to get high and play with weapons
Agree to hang out with him and then take a gigantic shit right on him. Or if youve forgiven him for being a fucker maybe make out with him.
At least your vagina gets to vagina again. Dust that thing off.
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
We will just distract him with tacos and porn.
We get up to three toppings. Dignity is not one of them.
Congrats, you are the first person our bartender ever met that actually needed wheeled out of a bar in a wheelchair. He said you were his hero.
Randomize
