I'm tuning in to watch Heidi Montag crash and burn on the Miss Universe Pageant. Somebody call 911. and I'm not talking about the Sean Kingston song.
I have a feeling this won't be the last time I wake up wrapped in a shower curtain with the words "Blame Bono" spray painted on it
My vagina supports interfraternal relations
She passed out on the kitchen table with two mickeys forties duct taped to her hands. Clearly she is going to fit perfectly in your house this semester
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My body is a temple...that happens to be able to get me free Patron shots at the bar
Even worse we were making a sex tape so our reaction to the condom breaking was recorded.
Ryan Reynolds is on sesame street right now. Dressed as a letter A but still sexy as fuck. PBS is so considerate of the stay at home mom.
I do NOT want to date a man who has no interest in going to a kangaroo farm
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When you have to have Siri remind you that you're on your period cuz you're so drunk you keep forgetting about tampons it might be time to call it a night.
I was going to text you that earlier, but I felt like before 10 was probably to early to bring up boners
We should buy t shirt guns and blow eggs out of them at his house. Bachelorette party
I don't care how hot she was. She didn't like Scooby Doo and I don't fuck with that.
i should probably stop doing things just because i think they’re funny. i’m not going to.
I can't believe the MLB is making the NHL look good.
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