he's the Salvador Dali of pubic shaving
you will always have a special place in my vag
just so you're aware of it in the morning: you tried to slide down the railing on a snuggie. twice.
I'll be a little late, "getting ready for the party" turned into "smoking a bowl and doing lines in my room for an hour and a half." But I'm on my way now. With coke. And weed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What color are my eyes?
Ummmm... 34 C?
I feel like he better crank it up to level RG IV tomorrow. It's the fucking playoffs.
Hows cali? I thought of you as I shaved 1/4 of my legs last night.
At 2pm we are having a MANDITORY house meeting about last night. ALL must be in attendance!
I'd like to review the planning and execution of the party to determine how we hosted a naked party, to determine how we can have more.
dude you literally had like 30 screwdrivers, i thought you were gonna die
that explains why my vomit smells like it came from florida
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How does a law student 15 days away from graduation prepare for a pass fail final? Drinking beer, eating thick cut bacon, and watching game of thrones, that's how
New low. Just realized I hooked up with a guy from Grindr in the hallway of a building my great grandfather used to own..
my mom talks about my drinking like its a problem and yet this morning she fills me a solo cup with champagne for the shower.
just drove past - why are you walking towards the shop in your pyjamas?
Can't talk, on a quest for bacon.
woke up with 4 bruises, 2 hickies and a bad case of rug burn. texans are dangerous.
So what if is hockey, you don’t turn down sex with a professional athlete. They work out all day and have amazing stamina. Your vagina will thank you!
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