well that was a long night...
dude, you were pretty messed up... what happened?
no idea... but i still woke up with my pirate hat on
I'm at the house listening to vengaboys alone. Please come home.
im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
I found what appears to be half an E pill and part of a tooth in my pocket this morning
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You told her to step on the scale because you had whiskey goggles, and scales don't lie.
As i was walking home this morning some old lady was walking her dog and i said hello to her as our paths in life met, then i proceeded to puke in someones front yard and never looked back
Oh and someone pissed in my shoes, so I'll let you figure that out.
I have a fever. Last thing I need to do tonight is be elbow deep in old lady pussy.
I found out he put two potatoes in a jar because he wants to make his own vodka.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The teenager outdrank all of us. All. Of. Us. I woke up and she was getting everyone water and fruit snacks. I give up.
I just smoked a joint and ate a sandwich while watching someone get arrested. Bonnaroo is a silly place.
WHERE THE FUCK'S MY FUCKING RITALIN YOU FUCKING FASCIST?????
So our bartender was in the bathroom the same time I was so I ordered a beer mid stream.....is that weird?
Does puke ruin car paint? Good thing it's raining.
Y’all did coke off my Puff The Magic Dragon plate.😂
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