Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
I just walked through a room full of deaf people and farted i love deaf people
Last night he tried to put me in their garbage can and then sprayed me with a fire extinguisher in their kitchen...that house is always interesting
She's echoing.. Her head must be in the toilet..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just reduced mom to tears when she realized I wasn't kidding about hating kids. She's crying about never being a gma. Now would be the time to tell her about the girl you knocked up. You're welcome.
Decided to go explore a half built apartment complex at 4 a.m and leave a 3 block obstacle course in the alley ways on the way home.
I say we start a new tradition. I came up with it all by myself. It's called work out, lay out, black out
When you mimic motorboating Jennifer Love Hewitt, is it really that hard to understand why no one thinks you're straight?
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Until you can top getting paid to have women tell you to check out their ass, my job will remain better than yours
I need you to ship me a penis cookie care package.
So we hooked up and then instead of texting me, he endorsed me on LinkedIn for Microsoft Word a few days later
Nothing showshows the government the middle finger more than spending your tax refund on drugs
You ran up a $300 bar bill on his card and he didn't have you arrested, be grateful and move on.
Also I found $40 in the women's bathroom at ihop. Karma is finally kicking in!
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