Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(413): View more from Massachusetts

I've been reduced to Capt. Morgan and Golden Girls reruns. Ugh.

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(719): View more from Colorado

just survived the first fart of the relationship.

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(727): View more from Florida

I showed my boss the "She Wolf" video. He sent it to all his friends and told me to make us martinis...thanks Shakira and keep it up

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(734): View more from Michigan

Can someone please explain to me how I got rugburn on my tits?

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These 19 Men’s Fashion Mistakes are Unforgivable, According to Women
Read it at the TFLN blog
(314): View more from Missouri

We just had the worst moment of our late twenties.... We just realized we are too old for the real world

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(443): View more from Maryland

its taking every last moral i have not to steal this bike

(303): View more from Colorado

you still have morals?

(443): View more from Maryland

Well actually itd just be too hard to ride the bike with this large rake i just stole

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(417): View more from Missouri

You totally left a blue butt print on our banister

(573): View more from Missouri

Well I think we can all agree that that's better than then bowl of puke I left last time.

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(207): View more from Maine

CALL 911 HAND IS STUCK IN THE GARBAGE DISPOSAL. HELP

(207): View more from Maine

Do we still have any pizza left from last night?

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(801): View more from Utah

He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.

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