Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
Im am drinking whisky alone in my parents basement. I think I just watched the point of no return stroll by.
I sent her a Relationship Request on Facebook last night, she accepted and we fucked.. I changed my Relationship Status to Single, I think she'll get the point
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
WHEN DID YOU SAY YOU COME BACK BC I GOT INVITED TO A KEG WAR PARTY
Serious question: Should I volunteer to get tazered? My instincts say no but my wild side says yes.
If i ever die cab you make sure bag pipes are at my funeral they are awsome
You tried to get the Waffle House waitress to put a candle in your cheesy hash browns.
You had a fry stuck to your face... Every five mins you would wake up, take a bite, put it back then fall asleep again...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
so as he was cumming he sort of growled with one eye squinted... for a moment there I thought I was fucking Popeye
Had to snap chat three different people to ask who left the bite mark on my thigh. All three said "Wasn't me". Now I can't wear a bathing suit to my mom's pool.
But I'm currently thinking of all my bad decision making last night and giving myself a time out.
FYI the blow job was for papa johns pizza
I regret 8000% nothing
There is a fake eye lash glued to one of my balls.
And then I woke you by humping you to Lionel Ritchie.
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