It took him longer to undo my bra than he lasted..
at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
He just went up to bed, still drunk from last night, carrying a pear, a pipe, and an unopened bottle of wine. I think he'll be fine.
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
I just had to download an app to edit pictures on my new phone. The things I do for sexting...
So on how many levels of wrong is it that I'm reconsidering my divorce simply because I don't want to go through getting used to shitting around someone again.
I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
I'm sorry you couldn't sneak away today. You're the only guy I'm fucking that I can talk with about the other guys I'm fucking, and I need some advice
I projectile vomited in his sisters room where the toiled would have been if it were the bathroom.
Fighting the urge to throw up all over my little brothers jr high basketball bench. Welcome home aaron
And tan into my neighbor in the elevator. She was going to the gym. I was covered in mascara and dog hair eating a hash brown
Last night turned out to be an expensive trip to your house between the ticket and the plan b. (Well I haven't gotten that yet)
And he listens to me when I talk to him like the hulk.
Sam was like the mother fucking Moses of drunk and underage kids and he lead them to safety away from the cops. He's a hero that we deserve.
Randomize