We traveled between two mile markers in 18 seconds. Do the math.
you were stealing lawn gnomes and punching cars. I'm not surprised you got arrested.
I'm like a wolly mammoth down there. what do I tell him?
you yelled "you will never make love to jesus" and then ran into the tv.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sunburnt clitoris. How do I deal with it.
I feel like our low point of the night was when we had to start chasing with ice cubes and wheat thins.
Whiskey and I have a long and stories tradition of excellence
Whatever. I am not explaining the physics of my dick slapping.
Taylor Swift needs more songs about threesomes. I'm not sure she gets me anymore.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He had a clap on lamp. So every time he was ramming into me, the lights kept turning on and off
His idea of a night out is drinking beer in the driveway. He's been on house arrest too long
Haha I had a heart to heart with a stripper so I would say it was a success?
He tripped and fell all the way to the ground and then stood right back with out spilling a drop of his 3/4 full glass of rum and coke. It was like watching something from the matrix
I brought an already opened bag of trail mix from home to snack on today. Some motherfucker ate all the m&ms out of it. I hate my roommates
5 am booty call not ok. The fact I actually went over definitely not ok. My vag needs to learn some control.
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