I'm like a new puppy, everybody wants to touch me
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
dont touch anything in my room. If its phallus shaped, i can almost guarantee its been in my vagina.
i'm using my hot pot to make jello shots in a muffin tin. i'm never ever graduating.
i'm trying to figure out what goes best with beef ramen. a 2007 merlot or a 2008 pinot noir? i'm leaning toward the pinot noir.
I'm making tacos. Give me one good reason why we shouldn't be high while eating those tacos.
Dude, somewhere around here makes 4loko slushies. I just decided coming home isn't so bad.
That's like lying to my vagina. I can't betray it like that.
im just sayin im driving an hr to pick her up, just cause shes your gf doesnt mean i shouldnt be entitled to a bj
Woke up shivering behind the titty bar, With the worst leg cramps. I'm like a poster boy for responsibility.
Already at the river; already getting fucked up. And yes that semicolon is legit because those are congruent statemests
she paid $15 and a box of cheerios for their acid
You kept flirting with some guy while I was throwing up on the sidewalk, and I screamed YOU DON'T LIKE MEN
What conversation warrents "penis" in rainbow comic sans
It may be a corded vibrator from the 90s but it gets the job DONE
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