DO IT!!! IT MUST BE FATE THAT I GAVE YOU THAT CONDOM!!!!
i hit her car. ill just send her a farmville gift in the morning. then it'll be alright.
Brutally Honest is my real middle name, Princess just sounds better.
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
Using a Nedi Pot after doing lines... at least I'm a health conscious drug user?
Apparently there was a point in the night that they literally thought he was dead, ass naked on the floor. That bad.
the whole "pretend to be sober/pull it together for my family" thing really blew up in my face when i threw up into my pillowcase.
How was the birthday sex?
Shit got outta hand. Honestly I think even my STDs have STDs.
Taking my underwear off at work was one of my better decisions this weekend
I asked him why I was having sex with him in the middle of having sex. It was sufficiently awkward.
I walked around with red solo cups on my feet, weeds tied around my neck and a tree in my hand
It was marvelous. I was drunkenly conversing with my professor in some of the best Spanish I've ever spoken.
He was stoned laying on my bed singing I'm a little tea cup while I took a pregnancy test. Thank god it was negative.
Somehow I became in charge of getting my mother laid? This can't be my life? Lol
It's become almost a Pavlovian response. The sound of the vacuum being run by hubby causes an instantaneous involuntary orgasm.
Randomize