is it considered a "problem" when you find a pickle slice in your bed in the morning or is it like a "super-awesome bonus"?
U just looked at me and said "wake me up when I'm done eating"
Is it socially acceptable to order two burrito bowls?
anything's socially acceptable if you do it with enough confidence
it's been like two and a half months. And I swear, I keep seeing walking dicks. I think I'm going crazy cause of lack of sex..
Fair warning: We've transformed the living room into a giant tent.
THE BIG GAY MAD HATTER IS HERE AND HE HAS DRUGS IN HIS PANTS FOR YOU. COME DOWNSTAIRS BITCHEZZZZ
I think I'm in love. He's everything I ever wanted for myself, just with a lot more drugs.
Get a piano. I want to have sex on it.
I have a cracked rib, no way in hell I'm bottoming for him tonight!
If you've ever wondered what a shitshow is, just watch me at the bar on a Friday. Or Tuesday. Take your pick.
also my alarm just went off. I am always amused at what time drunk me decides to wake up.
She started giving me head while we were watching the Walking Dead premiere, WORST BJ EVER.
Today is an "outside sex" kind of day.
If you're wondering about the mess, we had sex in the kitchen. There was noodles involved.
Should we make a shared Google doc list of places we want to fuck? Like a scavenger hunt?
Randomize
