It's true. Ladies love me because I'm so strong and they feel safe. Not because of my pseudo charm and their impaired judgement after several drinks...
Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
Yeah, we spent most of the evening making fun of the drunk girl until we realized it was you.
You hooked up with a kindergarten teacher?
Yea. It's kind of weird knowing that there are kindergarten teachers out there with their nipples pierced.
He was singing "i gotta feeling" under his breath as i was pulling my top off.
We pinky-swore to never fuck each other again.
I guess since this is supposed to be my year of the lesbian it's okay
They reenacted the scene from the lion king where mufasa talked to simba from the clouds. As high as they were they got it word for word. There has to be an award for that.
I'm on my fifth cocktail in twenty minutes. I don't think I will end this on two legs.
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
well he somehow got his hand stuck in some bike spokes trying to reach for a blunt he dropped and that's NOT the reason he's in the hospital...?
my poor anus
He and I tag each other in memes all day. You could say it's getting pretty serious.
Three cheers for handling my crush on my boss in an entirely reasonable manner, by having a threesome with my coworkers.
The bartender remember my drink from last sat. I think we just became drocals...drunk. locals.
Randomize
