HOLD UP I think she only has eight fingers...
Anyone ask you how much a bj cost yet? That shirt is so whorish
there should be a rule against ugly people hooking up.
yeah...but then what would the ugly people do? hook up with pretty people? yeahhh..don't see that happening in the near future. plus i'm not okay with that.
I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson
Getting pregnant off pre-cum is like getting high off erasers
Jon thought he was that blonde chick from Three's Company when he was shrooming
He wrote on the paper that he wanted a "Ptitty burreto" from taco bell...when we ordered it the girl paused and entered "Potatoe burrieto"....we laughed
Nothing is creepier than a guy telling you "I was just thinking about you" in a men's bathroom when taking a shit
I don't care that you had sex on my bed. I care that you used my lollipop condom. I was saving that for a special occasion
It was a special occasion. Your best friend had crazy awesome sex on your bed. Thank you
I think I just got buffalo sauce on my penis. Is that a turn on or off?
You make any dick jokes involving sushi and there WILL be consequences.
Sushi is fucking sacred in this house and I will kill you if you try and taint that.
Nothing like sitting at your midterm pissed at yourself because you put your graphing calculator batteries in your vibrator and forgot to put them back in before the exam 😑
I slept like a rock because of your dick. I'll thank him personally later.
I am NOT losing my v-card to a guy who doesn't know my ass from my elbow.
He's a freak. Not like "freak in the bed" freak but like "eats glue in the weekends" freak.
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