We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
I wish that guy wasn't missing teeth
this guy literally just gave me a gold star sticker for the "stellar" blow job i gave him. ashamed? i think not.
i am already firmly committed to doing irish carbombs w/ 12 different people, and the st pattys day party doesnt start for another 24 hours. i may die
How do you tell someone they are only invited if they put out?
I thought we agreed, no more super glueing action figures to my dick
Today's face brought to you by last night's make-up.
sometimes you just have to pull up your panties, blow a kiss to the security camera and walk out of the alley like nothing happened.
After he finished he sang his college fight song like it was some victory
He was hammered and shot his pistol into the lawn. Next thing I know sheriffs are at our house with M4s. He likes to party
my whole checking account just had a funeral down bourban street, paid for that, and then bought everyone 5 shots of fireball...
ok so i took my anxiety medication and i'm eating junior mints and i think my vagina will be ok
I got arrested in a leprechaun onesie
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
And, by “make you dinner” I mean “have lots of sex and multiple orgasms.” So you should probably eat something and before you come over
And hydrate too
Randomize
