Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
I just watched a guy get turned down by a prostitute
When he came he kept saying "oh god oh god" and he sounded just like his dad. awkward...
I walk in and my mom takes one look at me and just says, ".... Consequences"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He just said he wasn't going to drink on Saturday because he was drinking on Thursday and Friday...we need new friends.
gave myself the "you're a really good girlfriend" talk on the way to where i intentionally cheated on him. i am my own drunken therapist.
I hope your sleeping good cuz when u wake up im punching you square in the face
Pretty sure the nurse said at one point I was in full restraints because I tried surfing my stretcher
Turns out I sent a dick pic to my sister's ex. Grindr is the devil's eharmony.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Babe.. You are farting in your sleep and it literally smells like something crawled up your asshole and died.. I'm gagging and I feel like I'm eating your fart right now. I want to tape your ass cheeks shut and plug up that canon you call your ass. All I hear is snores and farts.. You are lucky I love you
Did you know that taking off a bra with teeth burns ninty calories?
I'm trying to get WebMD to diagnose me with a hangover
He told me the hickey on the side if his neck was actually a "bruise" from hitting a bird on his motorcycle. I'm not sure what's more impressive, the fact people believed him due to the size of the mark or the fact you gave it to him.
The cop said he like my hair today. Please explain all other interactions with law enforcement, k thanks
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
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