I just told her she was a heartbeat above a blowup doll.
I didn't realize he wasn't circumcised... it looked like the Unibomber...
he told me he wanted to get "words" tattooed on his penis so he could say hes always putting words in my mouth..
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
they drunkenly created an obstacle course for the poor hamster and its ball.
Do you remember trying to use a pencil, pen, and sunglasses as your second form of ID at the bar when they wouldn't let you in last night?
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
Yeah she let me pull the goalie and wear my USA flag like a cape since it was the first day of the world cup
I feel like I should acknowledge that I see you as a human and not a ragdoll sex object
Don't worry you weren't as drunk as you thought. You only fell 4 times.
He brought over a bottle of tequila and a box of donuts with the Plan B, so I guess you could say things are getting pretty serious.
What's the rule for getting in fights with homeless men in suits?
Here's a rule: don't
I just need to find someone whose kink is financial submission.
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
Randomize
