yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
you were sleeping on the floor, then you woke up and told me you were not comfy enough. You took the carpet in the bathroom put it in the bath and you slept there.
Ive never seen him vulnerable before. He just had surgery and looked so cute on his crutches. like a little baby bird with a broken wing. that i wanted to nurse back to health. with my vagina
It's ok, I like adventure. Just ask my vagina.
I wasn't half as drunk as u but u were saying u were a "worm" and u tried to slither out of my grasp
He is asleep with his dick hanging out of my my little pony pajamas. I am required to wake this man up by blowjob
Your sexual fantasies often terrify me but get a pic
Sorry about coming to the pool in only a thong. I thought you said it was closed. Not that you were teaching a group of kids how to swim.
It is officially settled in my mind that fuck the hot grad student is THE goal this year
He found a way to charmingly ask me for a threesome and when I said no he made it sound like he was even happier. He's a fucking wizard
Last night I dreamed that I got eaten out by Lego Harry Potter.
I am lonely and hungry. I need a girlfriend, but I'd settle for my mom.
Is a swingers hotel appropriate for an anniversary?
What is my life coming to that I have to cross state lines to get laid?
You threw him in the dryer?
He went in of his own accord. Mumbled something about experiencing the blossoming of popcorn.
Randomize
