I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
i just found a bag of weed behind my capital one card. i guess that's what's in my wallet.
I am so stoned and my professor is handing out candy. I love Halloween.
we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
he's mad because you were 'slandering his penis'.
He was going nice and slow, then he yelled " BOONNEESTOORRMM!!!!!". I can't walk straight.
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
He just walked into my room in a robe with a cooking pot of cereal.
Started with us just having a beer. Now Ivan lit a torch to walk to the store, Ben smashed a 26 in the parking lot, and they're throwing broken shot glasses. Fratio Friday is something.
Ok, was I really fucked up or was there a chick from Norway in the ice cream shop teaching us Norwegian last night?
Oh that's what I forgot last night.. To make out with her.
Hypothetically how does one go about throwing away a dildo?
There should be a promo code on the Papa Johns website for "I have no moneys but if you send a cute delivery guy I will pay him in blow jobs."
I have no idea, I usually just project my awkwardness out like a mating call until it draws other awkward members of the opposite sex out from the bushes
Sunday morning breakfast with the boyfriends family. I just puked in the stall at Cracker Barrell. Classy.
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