i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
it's my fault, I passed out instead of getting up to pee.
he chased her out of the bar yelling "TAKE MY VIRGINITY" and i havent seen her since
i seriously just saw a stripper from last weekend walk into the classroom next to me!!
I will now attempt to shave my public hair into a Christmas tree.
At the bar. Madeline and I totally brought our own pitcher from home because they always run out. Hello alcoholism.
I beat my mom's friend's boyfriend in a vodka chugging competition. Our generation FTW.
Because its Monday... And I'm determined to just be drunk for the rest of the semester
...You tried to use your wallet to call her after you gave your cell phone to the cab driver as a "peace offering"
You're the common denominator of my blackouts.
so it took us like 45 minutes to get into the party.... then when we wanted to leave we were blocked and forced to stay.
....you got kicked INTO a party??
So like, boobs.
are you really going to start every conversation like that?
I was so high. I had so much hair. It was like all my hair follicles exploded.
So it turns out "let's pretend to be gay so guys will stop hitting on us" was step one in her plan to get me into bed...
How was the party
I came home with only one shoe, a t shirt tied around my shoeless foot and I was covered in motor oil. Oh and my shorts were inside out. So you tell me
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