I swear if I see one more guy in a v-neck and fedora I'm going to punch someone in the balls. This is philly, you're not supposed to look like Ryan Cabrera
Just got a citation from campus security for an "accordion disturbance."
you kept telling everyone that you were the mayor of silverware town
Just spent the last three hours in the library successfully refreshing facebook
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm not accepting baked goods from anyone for awhile. especially after the stalker pie.
No no no...you park the car, stick your tongue down his throat, slip your number in his pocket, invite him to insomnia, and THEN LEAVE. You go from awkward to epic in a matter of seconds.
I was ashamed to still be in my green tank this morning, but there's a guy here in full on bright green pants and a green blazer. He looks like the lucky charms guy stretched out at drunker than usual. Now, I fade into the background.
It was a perpetual wrestle for who got to be on bottom. Laziest hookup ever.
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wearing a shark mask, slugging tequilla, in cowboy boots, and not minding that my spandex is on backwards. What are you up to?
Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer...
Also, I have your check. Also, still wanna drop acid?
I'm like a hairless cat ready to be ravished
Sometimes self-care is taking a shot of vodka and moving on.
Wanna go on a picnic?
... by picnic I mean wanna sit on a blanket and drink with me?
Randomize