Do you have swine flu?
I know my taste in men is not always top notch; however, I don't sleep with swine.
Pigs, yes. Swine, no.
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
I'm buying eyelash glue, salt, and limes. We know how tonight is ending.
please dont make me drink to the titanic soundtrack
it is entirely possible that the police will be knocking on the door in 25 minutes
he told me my vagina was like a beautiful piece of salami
I did nothing besides stay sober all night, I walked home to find max naked knocking cups off the counter with his cock lol
All I wanted was a hug. You dirty, dirty whore.
MAYDAY. glass in foot, have crush on guy with mullet.life is over.
I only listened to his story about leaving the Amish community because I was hoping for a free drink
Don't know how your birthday has been, but mine has involved Hershey's syrup and a blowie. It's safe to say you're playing catch up.
If I got paid for every bad decision I've made I would be one rich bitch by now
Some guy named spider just bought me 5 shots
Always a gay best friend, never a bridesmaid
You were painting for six hours and managed one four foot wall. "The Mellow Handyman" isn't a good business model.
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