He looks like a mix between a retired piano teacher and a cat that just swallowed a sock.
There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
At beerfest, hammered, going to try to not get naked in public but i cant make any promises
uh, 3 redbulls and 400mg of caffeine pills and i still feel like life is in slowmotion..lets not take tranquilizers again.
Dude, Donte totally wants it. I don't have any idea how I do it. I'm not even cool. I'm not even the hero Gotham deserves. I'm barely high. My hands are swelling. Want me to pick you up anything from five guys?
Totally. Bang on. He'll be fine. He might cry into your perfect tits once in a while, but that's the price ya pay.
first thing my tuition money buys is a strap on
You ninja crawled over five sleeping guys to get in my room at 6 in the morning to wake me up for sex
...and I think that may just be my favorite moment in our fuckbuddyship
He went snooping and now he's all intimidated by my super amazing box of sexy time toys.
Please stop calling it that.
I didn't even have pants on and you think I had an agenda
Eating chips and sending nudes. This is my life.
You're best friend just tackled me....naked....brought me to his room where he had freshly baked cinnamon rolls. I didn't know he could cook
I think I should write my liver a thank you note. If it had my work ethic, I would be dead now.
I might be a bit longer... I found a hot guy at the grocery store, so I'm following him and buying stuff that he's buying
She just texted me saying "come over and eat me out, my vagina smells like honey glazed ham." I know I shouldn't be, but i'm just so curious.
Randomize
