I just farted. And everybody around me is looking at the fat girl to my left. I win.
A 21st bday and NYE should be illegal to have in the same week...
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
I just stole a cupcake from somebody's bottle service
And I got $4 when somebody made it rain.
Finished watching the entire first season of mighty morphing power rangers. Now I have nothing. Not even a life.
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
You invited the cop in for a "Celebrity shot"
hahaha every time i hear a motorcycle i think about that one time you almost died
Thanks for the flashbacks you prick.
All I remember is sitting on your kitchen floor and playing with a banana like it was a viking ship.
Worse. He's Mormon. At least a gay guy will go get drinks with me.
I think I pulled a boob muscle during phone sex
IF YOU DIE ON LSD YOU DIE FOR REAL
you can't just call dibs on my vagina bro.
Randomize
