thank god random hookups don't end with college. happy birthday, america.
its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
Hooked up with my first aid and cpr teacher last night. She dressed as a lifeguard and brought me back to life. Beat that.
I hope the doctor doesnt lift up and my shirt and listen to my lungs. I dont want to explain why I have rug burns on my back.
i'm sad. The beetle crawled away. I was only trying to get him stoned.
Did i mention i'm like the equivilent of a prepubescent boy suffering from preejaculacy? I just about creamed my pants when he grabbed my hand..
She can't meet us until 830...there's no hope for our sobriety at that hour
I can't believe you picked a finger in the ass over lunch with me.
On her way to bed she said, "If you have sex on the couch, just move my blanket" Needles to say, we moved the blanket
I climaxed at the same time the bass dropped. I think it's safe to say I've reached enlightenment
I totally have a huge crush on him though which is fucking up my "classy she-demon with limited feelings" vibe
He asked me what I wanted for Christmas. I told him an orgasm would be nice.
No alcohol sales on Election Day. WTF? Today, of all days, I need to be splurged to to vote for any of these morons running for president.
Interesting. All i can really say is humanoid shaped doritos bags melting very slowly
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
Randomize
