yes because when i jack off the first person i think about is christina applegate
I don't remember her name, all I remember is trying to suck the wedding ring off her finger.
he turned the pretty ricky playlist on. its about to go down.
She's pissed. She declared she was moving out and proceeded to pack 3 pairs of shoes, her electric wine opener and ONE sock. Then told us to have fun paying her portion of the rent.
I'm hoping that banging a 24 year old 3 times cancels out banging that freshman on Wednesday
Just paid off my possession ticket on 4/20. Helloooo awesome.
What's up with the fire hydrant in the laundry room?
pain. pain everywhere. this is why throwing yourself at concrete is a bad idea.
Totally uneven. One tiny pussy lip that almost didn't exist and one giant lip that unfurled liked 5 different times half way down her leg and could have been used to hoist the mainsail on a pirate ship.
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
Just finished off half a bottle of vodka. Can't take in anymore liquids so I ate 3 spoonfuls of your powdered gatorade to fight off the hangover. Wish me luck and check me for a pulse when you get in!
Freshly fucked must agree with my hair cause I've gotten compliments on it this afternoon
Its mothers day... Can my present be an orgasm...for once?
woke up hungover this morning lying in a water raft covered in water.. i dont know if i should consider this good or bad
You made me take you back to Mcdonalds so you could yell at the guy for not giving you enough ketchup packets
I vaguely recall french fries...
You then proceeded to call your mom and tell her you weren't coming home because you were "tripping balls"
Sweet...
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